Today I’ve been thinking a lot about my anxiety and how I often go into what I call “panic mode” when something unexpected happens. Lately I’ve been doing a lot better when it comes to my anxiety. It feels like I been on autopilot since the end of November last year. I kind of feel numb and a little exhausted, which is normal considering all the things that happened in 2019 and 2020. However, I’ve been trying to change and retrain the way I react and think once an issue pops up. It’s been much harder than I anticipated. It’s been one of the hardest habits I’ve tried to break. I’ve been doing much better, and then all of a sudden, random things started happening this past weekend. Things that usually gets my anxiety in a frenzy.
I am not going to lie; I did have a couple hours of uneasiness with each situation and surprise but then I thought about something I heard before a long time ago. I can’t remember who said it, but the person mentioned how your first thoughts can have an affect on the outcome of the situation. They said your first initial reactions is to tell yourself that it’s going to be okay. So, right when fear started take over, I just closed my eyes and started to practice my deep breathing. I then placed my hand over my chest and repeated the words “Everything will be okay.” “I am going to be okay.” I said it over and over a few times. I continued my night and tried to deal with the situation and my thoughts the best way I could.
I can’t say that I handled the situation in the best way, but I did the best that I could given the circumstances. I am trying to be more positive and not always assume the worst. I just want to keep a clear mind and remain calm. Sometimes a lot of us tend to worry about every little thing that happens, and the situation might not even be anything to get all bent out of shape about. It’s challenging, but I know I will get there. It’s hard breaking old habits that you’ve had for half of your life, but I’m a work in progress. I just have to breathe and remind myself that I will be okay. As soon as you say the words and marinate on it, you start to feel a little more at ease. We just have to say the words every time our anxiety appears.