Today I was thinking a lot about who I am and my connections in the past. I always felt like I couldnât connect with people. It was like I was surrounded by groups, and I didnât quite fit into any of them. Most of the time I feel like two people in one body. I am an introvert who loves to be by myself. I enjoy my own company, and Iâm rarely ever bored. I can easily entertain myself with a book, show/movie, drawing/coloring, baking, writing, gaming or just sitting in silence. I feel like Iâm at full battery when Iâm alone, and when Iâm surrounded by a sea of people, I feel like my energy is quickly diminishing. Other times I am a weirdo. I am goofy and I march to the beat of my own drummer. Most people donât see this side of me. I am very guarded and usually if I let my guard down a little it backfires sometimes. I can be silly, whimsical and in my own little world, but I often feel judged when I am.
Growing up I just felt like I should be trying to fit in more. I felt bad that I couldnât connect with others as easy as my peers. It wasnât until a few years ago where I stopped caring. Itâs okay to be an introvert and itâs okay to be a little weird. I donât always have to connect with people. After I realized that I have a handful of people who I do connect with, I let go of the thought of me being broken. I donât care if Iâm too quiet, awkward or weird for people. Maybe I am a required taste like sushi. Who knows? All I know is that once I started to focus on who loved and accepted me for me, thatâs all that mattered. Iâm happy with who I am, and Iâm okay with being a complicated original masterpiece. đ
Elle Reyđ 